And This Is Why I Like to Eat By Myself . . . (Major Rant)

My aunt, uncle and I had just finished eating when, for some stupid reason, we got on the subject of success. My aunt immediately blurts out, "Oh, Amber (my cousin) is definitely going to succeed in life." Amber is way smarter than me, so I'm inclined to agree. Then I said that I figured my other cousin would also succeed, and they both agreed with me. My aunt said she hopes the oldest of my cousins will find a decent path in life too.

And then, it's silence. And then they change the subject.

Now, is anything said about me? No. THe thing is, my aunt and uncle have actually said they think I will succeed in life. The thing that bugs me is that the instant the word "success" is mentioned, everyone automatically thinks of Amber, because she's so smart and ambitious. No one thinks of me. Why would they, I'm just a stupid, un-educated loser with no friends, anti-social tendencies and no talent. My favorite pasttimes? Sleeping, writing, watching movies and reading. Guess what my aunt thinks my future is going to be? A cosmetics girl at Macy's. She thinks that is the perfect future for me. Amber, of course, is going to be a paleontologist something-or-other. Me? I'm gonna probably just be spritzing people with perfume and stuffing mascara samples down people's throats.

Deep down, though, I don't give a fucking crap what I end up doing. Other people I meet have goals, they have a dream career and they actually are going to pursue it. I just don't care that much. I don't want money, or a mansion, or a husband and kids, or anything. I don't really even care about going to college that much. I don't care about getting a license. But everyone is on my back about doing all this shit, they even want me to enroll in college like right now, as soon as I pass the GED. But, I don't want to yet. I feel like I have this internal clock, and it's going to tell me when it's the right time to do things, to take the big steps, but everyone is trying to get me to do everything RIGHT NOW. And when I say I'm not ready yet, they think I'm just scared or avoiding it.

And that's why, when they ask me what I REALLY want to do, I don't tell them the truth. It's because the thing I want most of all, is to get away from them.

funny thing is I hate school but scool was forced on me... so I enrolled after all...my struggles my parents were still proud of me....

I'm not that smart either and my goal in life is to be a tranny in the sex trade since I was 15 but your goal change afte awhile... I am not sure I want to be a tranny anymore but I'm sure now I don't want to be in the sex trade.. I know I'm better than that.

I can relate. My goals are simple and unconventional, as are yours. What might be viewed as success by one person may be failure in the eyes of another. ..But that doesn't make it any less than success in one of its many incredible forms. If your only goal is to get away, then succeed with this and you'll truly be successful, regardless of what your family may think. The worst thing you can possibly do is live your life strictly by their standards. Live for your benefit, not your family's. Your life is your own to do with as you please. Don't ever think otherwise.

Taylor please don't let others to let you down. Please stand up and think in a positive way. Your a sweet beautiful girl and i'm sure they think about you. Try to work harder on your studies. Wish you all the best sweetie <3