How people tick me off

Well, I've been trying to "hold my tongue" more, and because of it, I'm in great need of a rant. Instead of discussing this rationally with someone, I'll just spill my guts here.

Why does it matter what kind of medication I put in my body? It's not like I'm taking them as the bad kind of drugs, or using them as "the easy way out." Everybody says, "It's purely spiritual," about my disorder. I would like any of the pastors or other church leaders to point out in the Bible where it says that I can't take medicine for it. Heck, give me any kind of proof! I don't recall God ever saying that it was wrong to take medicine for OCD, or any other "mental" disorder. Speaking of which, did you know that OCD is actually a biological problem? It's not a mental problem, not a spiritual problem, etc.

But of course, none of you would know, because you refuse to do any actual research, or listen to me (the only person who's done any research). If I weren't so concerned about causing a scene, I'd stand up and tell the whole youth group about how I've started taking pills, and how darn happy I am about it. No one will change that, or that I actually have some self-esteem and can say that I'm proud of myself.

Also, there's you. I can't really be mad at you for being extremely apprehensive about me taking the pills. Your cousin got addicted to them, I understand. I'm not mad about that. I'm mad that you're such a liar. You only hung out with me when you had no one else around, acting like we were best friends. When someone else you knew came, I was just another person you didn't know. Then, I become best friends with one of your good friends, and suddenly you're talking to me more.

You even requested for me to be in your cabin at camp this year. AND, you sister said you wanted to get to know me better there. So, I try talking to you, only getting one-line replies from you. Finally, a day or two later, you tell me, "You don't have to follow me, you know." Oh well, excuse me, I just thought you wanted to talk a little. I figured you just weren't talkative, but I guess you lied. I doubt your sister would've lied, because she's proven to be a much better friend than you. So yeah, have fun with your "real" friends. You're all too fake for my taste anyways.

P.S. Thanks for the humiliation. It's not as if I was already struggling to fit in.

They don't know what's best for you. You do what you think you need to do, and if it helps you, then that's great. That's wonderful that you're proud of yourself
r54444444444jjjjjjjjjjjjtttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttp0po./'lkiij <- from my cat

black star wrote:Well, I've been trying to "hold my tongue" more, and because of it, I'm in great need of a rant. Instead of discussing this rationally with someone, I'll just spill my guts here.

Why does it matter what kind of medication I put in my body? It's not like I'm taking them as the bad kind of drugs, or using them as "the easy way out." Everybody says, "It's purely spiritual," about my disorder. I would like any of the pastors or other church leaders to point out in the Bible where it says that I can't take medicine for it. Heck, give me any kind of proof! I don't recall God ever saying that it was wrong to take medicine for OCD, or any other "mental" disorder. Speaking of which, did you know that OCD is actually a biological problem? It's not a mental problem, not a spiritual problem, etc.

But of course, none of you would know, because you refuse to do any actual research, or listen to me (the only person who's done any research). If I weren't so concerned about causing a scene, I'd stand up and tell the whole youth group about how I've started taking pills, and how darn happy I am about it. No one will change that, or that I actually have some self-esteem and can say that I'm proud of myself.

Also, there's you. I can't really be mad at you for being extremely apprehensive about me taking the pills. Your cousin got addicted to them, I understand. I'm not mad about that. I'm mad that you're such a liar. You only hung out with me when you had no one else around, acting like we were best friends. When someone else you knew came, I was just another person you didn't know. Then, I become best friends with one of your good friends, and suddenly you're talking to me more.

You even requested for me to be in your cabin at camp this year. AND, you sister said you wanted to get to know me better there. So, I try talking to you, only getting one-line replies from you. Finally, a day or two later, you tell me, "You don't have to follow me, you know." Oh well, excuse me, I just thought you wanted to talk a little. I figured you just weren't talkative, but I guess you lied. I doubt your sister would've lied, because she's proven to be a much better friend than you. So yeah, have fun with your "real" friends. You're all too fake for my taste anyways.

P.S. Thanks for the humiliation. It's not as if I was already struggling to fit in.

Sweetie I'm an Orthodox christian. Like most of the russians my aunt and family never believed in god. But i believed in god. I still believe, but i can't stand what they do by the name of god. That's why i stopped going church. It's hard to deal with a group that i'm not matching with :[sorry if i offend you <3

sweetie your friend sounds like someone who's not good. I think the best thing to do is don't be close with that friend. My gf got a friend who behaves like your friend. :[ don't let anyone get you down. Don't let anyone to control your life by the name of god. Stand up for your rights sweetie. Do what your heart says if you feel it's right thing to do <3

abby wrote:They don't know what's best for you. You do what you think you need to do, and if it helps you, then that's great. That's wonderful that you're proud of yourself
r54444444444jjjjjjjjjjjjtttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttttp0po./'lkiij <- from my cat

Thanks I know, I just get fed up with their crap.

[quote="TatyanaSimonovich"]

black star wrote:Well, I've been trying to "hold my tongue" more, and because of it, I'm in great need of a rant. Instead of discussing this rationally with someone, I'll just spill my guts here.

Why does it matter what kind of medication I put in my body? It's not like I'm taking them as the bad kind of drugs, or using them as "the easy way out." Everybody says, "It's purely spiritual," about my disorder. I would like any of the pastors or other church leaders to point out in the Bible where it says that I can't take medicine for it. Heck, give me any kind of proof! I don't recall God ever saying that it was wrong to take medicine for OCD, or any other "mental" disorder. Speaking of which, did you know that OCD is actually a biological problem? It's not a mental problem, not a spiritual problem, etc.

But of course, none of you would know, because you refuse to do any actual research, or listen to me (the only person who's done any research). If I weren't so concerned about causing a scene, I'd stand up and tell the whole youth group about how I've started taking pills, and how darn happy I am about it. No one will change that, or that I actually have some self-esteem and can say that I'm proud of myself.

Also, there's you. I can't really be mad at you for being extremely apprehensive about me taking the pills. Your cousin got addicted to them, I understand. I'm not mad about that. I'm mad that you're such a liar. You only hung out with me when you had no one else around, acting like we were best friends. When someone else you knew came, I was just another person you didn't know. Then, I become best friends with one of your good friends, and suddenly you're talking to me more.

You even requested for me to be in your cabin at camp this year. AND, you sister said you wanted to get to know me better there. So, I try talking to you, only getting one-line replies from you. Finally, a day or two later, you tell me, "You don't have to follow me, you know." Oh well, excuse me, I just thought you wanted to talk a little. I figured you just weren't talkative, but I guess you lied. I doubt your sister would've lied, because she's proven to be a much better friend than you. So yeah, have fun with your "real" friends. You're all too fake for my taste anyways.

P.S. Thanks for the humiliation. It's not as if I was already struggling to fit in.

Sweetie I'm an Orthodox christian. Like most of the russians my aunt and family never believed in god. But i believed in god. I still believe, but i can't stand what they do by the name of god. That's why i stopped going church. It's hard to deal with a group that i'm not matching with :[sorry if i offend you <3

sweetie your friend sounds like someone who's not good. I think the best thing to do is don't be close with that friend. My gf got a friend who behaves like your friend. :[ don't let anyone get you down. Don't let anyone to control your life by the name of god. Stand up for your rights sweetie. Do what your heart says if you feel it's right thing to do <3
[/quote

Thanks <3 Don't worry, you didn't offend me While I think it's good to have fellowship with fellow Christians, I think it's better to have your own prayer, studies, etc. instead of church when people in churches are like that. It's really hard for me to trust anyone, even a little bit, because I feel like they'd shame me if they knew that I am taking meds after all. I won't let them control me at all. They're choosing to only have their way, and it's alright if they somehow find out and disagree. I won't sacrifice my beliefs for social security. I believe that I'll finally be able to beat my OCD once the medicine starts working, and when I take it long enough. No one will convince me I'm a pagan for it, like they've insinuated.